Rejection

I’ve been rejected.

It’s heartbreak in the most business sense. I finally garnered up the courage to direct message a blogger that I admire, albeit undercover. I told them I admired their work, loved what they do, and wanted to swap internet tips. Then, like a girl asking a boy to love her, I asked the daunting question: Would you be interested?

I sat there, vulnerable and exposed, and waited.

I was sure they would say yes. How could such an incredible, smart, intelligent, upstanding person ever say no to such a polite and flattering request?

I guess it could’ve also seemed random and creepy. But I digress.

The blogger responded pretty quickly with a no. They tried to be funny about it. I appreciated their honesty.

But just like that, my relationship with them ended before it even began.

They always say, “Don’t meet your idols.” The sight of their flesh and bones will make them human to you. And human isn’t always a good thing. Well, in this magically inter-connected world, don’t message your idols on social media either. Attached to those fingertips on a keyboard are hands and arms and a body, just like yours. Just like in the physical realm, they are entitled to push you back into that small, dark and insignificant corner of the interwebs from where you came, from where I lay crying myself to sleep. Boo hoo. Welcome home.